Not This Time

Christmas is a hard time for many people. If you are like me the weight of expectations can sometimes seem unbearable. Or the thought of wearing a fake smile to another holiday party is enough to make you want to get out the clippers and buzz off all of your hair. But this year, shortly after my birthday in October, I began to ask the Lord to change my attitude and reveal to me the reason that I protest Christmas kicking and screaming. In my mind and heart, I came to the throne room with my offering to lay down at his feet; it was an offering of my hurts, disappointments, and feelings of failure associated with the Christmas Seasons of the past. To some that may seem like a crappy offering to someone as Holy and Wonderful as Christ, but in my relationship with Him I have come to understand that those are perfect offerings! So, I approached the throne with open hands and left it all there vowing not to look back or sneak back and tell the Lord, "oh, I forgot to take this with me." and pick it up once again. Whew! What a relief to leave that behind! But now, the work would begin- walking it out. Believe me when I say that the temptation to go back and pick it up came often. Believe me when I tell you that circumstances presented themselves to tempt me to go back. Only by God's grace which has been sufficient for me (2 Corinthians 12:9) have I not. It is now 3 days before Christmas and I have had such peace and joy for the first Christmas in a very, very, very long time. I can't explain how it happened. My sweet husband has sat in amazement at the power of Christ and the work He has begun in me. I have come to realize that God is a lot like a great pool player or Bejeweled player if you know that game. He does something that sets something up for the next move, that sets something up for the next move.  This one little victory over my years of being Scrooge has given me the confidence to overcome other areas of my life that need refining. Praise God that He loves me enough to want to see me victorious and free!  He wants that for all of us!

The second portion of my prayer, reveal to me the reason that I protest Christmas, is still being revealed to me. Some of it has become clear while other parts are still foggy. So I wait for his perfect timing.

For those of you who are still struggling with the Christmas Season, please know you are not alone. But also know that the King of Kings waits patiently for you to bring your offering to the throne...when you are ready. 

Merry Christmas!

I am Learning to Sit at His Feet....